the love of a shark

I touch the glimmering reflection of the moon. A chill runs through me. My heart is pounding. Slowly I back up. One...two...three...four...five steps.

Then I take off running. My feet leave the solid safety of the rock. For a second I hang there suspended in the air. Then I feel my fingertips split the glassy smooth water. I open my eyes and find the water as clear as its glassy surface.

As the initial chill fades away I find a calmness I've never known before. The water completely engulfs me. All sense of time and direction has left my mind entirely. Strangely I feel no need to surface and fill my lungs.

I am jerked out of my lost state of mind by the realization of something or someone else's presence near me. My heart skips a few beats. A shark! Fear clenched my heart. I have lost my ability to move. I begin to slowly descend. But the shark does not make a move. As quickly as it came my fear melted away into a state of slightly hypnotized awe. It is the biggest shark I have ever seen, but also the most beautiful. Its skin is pure white. It shimmers in the moonlight, or is it giving off it's own light?

The bio-luminescent shark does not attack me. I cannot figure out why. Its jaws could swallow me whole. I do not know why but a sudden impulse leaves me staring into its beautiful eyes. In its eyes I find, not a look of anger or hunger or greed, but of compassion!

The biggest shark in all the ocean caring for me? It could just as easily gulp me down its throat! I am deep in thought, but still an answer will not come. When I find my brain too tired to think anymore I again drift out of that deep land of thoughts. But by now the shark is gone. I find myself wishing and longing for it to return again. Again to see the love of a shark!

Searching

hidden
lost in a crowd
searching
but it's too loud
knowing
that somethings there
waiting
for someone to care
looking
I cannot see
forgotten
where can it be
suddenly
I think I know
remember
where did it go
bringing
a spark of hope
flying
up the steep slope
trying
just to hold on
hoping
it won't be gone
found
what I've been looking for
happy
feel like I could soar

a voice on the wind

the sun sets behind purple clouds
soft sand sinks beneath my feet
the ocean waves crash
softly on the shore
and I hear someone call my name
as look out into the distance
but no one's there
maybe it was my imagination
sometimes it runs away
again I hear a voice
someone called my name
where did it come from?
"who are you?" I whisper
there's no reply
a minute goes by

then I hear it again
a voice on the wind
"where are you?" I wonder
barely a whisper
a silent reply
the voice on the wind
"everywhere" is the cry
I don't understand it
who can this be?
why would He bother
with someone like me?
"you are important
as each person is,
each a part of the puzzle
each irreplaceable"
I don't understand it
but what can I say?
I'm shocked and confused
what can this mean?
I'll always remember
those words on the wind
in the hope that someday
I'll meet Him again
and through it find the purpose
that He meant for me

If I could sing a little louder

If I didn't know better
I might think you'd understand
If I didn't know better
I would think about what I hear
Maybe I'd be better off
If I didn't know better

If I could see a little clearer
I might have seen that coming
If I could see a little clearer
I would have seen the difference
I know I'd be better off
If I could see a little clearer

If I could sing a little louder
You might have heard me calling
If I could sing a little louder
Someone might have looked my way
I'm sure I'd be better off
If I could sing a little louder

If I'd only been there
I might have seen it too
If I'd only been there
I would have heard the truth
I certainly would be better off
If I'd only been there

If I wouldn't have heard that
I might have lived in ignorance
If I wouldn't have heard that
I would not have found importance
I wouldn't be better off
If I wouldn't have heard that

If I knew what I know now
I might not have reacted the same
If I knew what I know now
Would I still have saved the day?
I think that I was better off
Not knowing what I know now

If I felt what I feel now
I might have thought differently
If I felt what I feel now
I would have cried hard
Surely I was better off
Not feeling what I feel now

If I'd only have said what I wanted to
I might not have lived in regret
If I'd only have said what I needed to
I would not be so frustrated right now
I just would have been better off
If I'd only have said what I wanted to


I only have a small picture of the meaning of this poem, I think that I just wrote it! that's what I do, I write stuff and then think of a meaning for it! I think this one could be like someone who's lived a long life and is looking back on it all and thinking of there regrets.... maybe I'm not even sure. mostly though I think it's about people looking back on things that have happened in the past and wondering if things would have gone differently if they'd have done something differently.......

Beatiful Cornfields

cornfields miles long
beauty is hidden

secret but strong
running forbidden
through cornfields so long

green and unending
somehow inviting
songs they are sending
need for writing
cornfield songs unending

longing inside me
for cornfields forever
wanting again to see
dreading it never
wanting cornfields beside me

"that wall could fall...."

I felt so jittery and nervous. My eyes scanned the crowd of people filing into the middle school gym. I took a deep breath and looked at all the choir kids I was surrounded by, but they all looked a same to me. Black and white. That's what I saw through my glazed over nervous eyes. The gym was filling up fast. My heart raced in my chest. Why was I so nervous? I've done choir concerts before, even in front of a lot more people. Still I could not stop shaking. I had a solo! Kids that I knew from school were there. They'd never heard me sing before. Some of them had never even heard me speak! That's because, even though some people can't believe it, I'm pretty shy at school. I kind of keep my opinions to myself. I sat and listened to the younger choirs sing. I said a quick silent prayer. I tried to slow my breathing. Then the choir director announced my choir. Walking down the blue bleachers with my choir, all dressed in black and white, my nerves just would not give me a break. We sang through our songs. They were really fun songs. Some were from the fifties! Still there was an underlying sense of dread that filled me. It's one thing to sing with a group in front of an audience. It's something else completely to sing a solo in front of an audience. When it was time for the last song, all the choirs came down to sing with us. The four soloists stepped off the risers. Our concert was Frank Sinatra themed. It was kind of funny that the song we sang was "High Hopes" a song about over coming problems. When I prayed for the performance earlier I didn't feel like my prayer had been answered, but when I stepped up to the microphone the nervousness washed out of me and I surprised myself by singing out loud and clear. The last words were "that wall could fall..." And that's exactly how it felt. Like God knocked over that wall. It was just a small solo, but for me it was an amazing accomplishment.

reality

what if
if only
maybe
that place that we think is reality until we're thrown out of it,
what if it is reality?
sometimes life can seem so full of good things that you forget about the sadness of others.
or maybe that's backwards.
then some rude interruption breaks through and you realize that you've only been living in a dream and there never really was a perfect world.
but it's like we're always searching for that goodness in life.
always hoping that it really is there, clinging to the small bit of hope that maybe that was reality and this was the dream.
oh how we wish.
could it be though.
could we really just be caught in a never ending dream that everyone thinks is reality?
maybe
if only
what if

reality

one word

the early winter wind set a course through the canopy of leafless trees. happy people stood in wait for the appearance of something amazing. they didn't know what and they didn't know who, but still they waited. most of them didn't have any idea why they were even there. suddenly the sky awakened with a brightness beyond comprehension. people stared, unable to take their eyes off of the beautiful spectacle. what was happening? something unknown to anyone. then suddenly without a trace it was gone. something drifted down to the people from the sky. a piece of paper landed on the frost covered grass beneath their feet. it only had one word on it. a word that could change the lives of many people standing around there. something that would contradict some, maybe even make them cringe. some people would find hope in it. some would realize their true potential. that word would burn into the heart of every single person there. suddenly a raindrop fell. heads turned to see the clouds rolling in from the east. a storm was coming. the people scattered. suddenly the leafless trees were left alone. still the wind echoed that word. and what is that word you may ask. but in all reality i don't even know...

rainy forest.....

the wind blows on in the trees
the rain pours on the streets
the clouds thunder, so do the seas
a boy walks, but no one, he meets

his world is empty
empty of joy
his thoughts are shifty
but on walks the boy

through a dark forest
the rain still comes down
he searches for a rest
he feels he might drown

a scary story
for him is sound
but do not worry
he will be found

a world of loss
has found its end
a bridge to cross
a heart to mend

never the same
changed forever
a voice shouts his name
he has not heard it, ever

who did it come from
who could it be
why did it say,"come"
why could he not see

a hand reaches out
a hand of grace
saved! he could shout
joy filled his face

pulled out of the dark

that horrible water
saved from the shark
thank you so much, sir

out of the forest
the rain has stopped
finally he has found rest
the burden has dropped




I really have no clue why I wrote this. Where did it come from? What is it about? Who do these characters represent? Do they represent anyone or anything at all? I really could not tell you what the answers to those questions are... I'll let you decide. I kind of just wrote it. :D

Maybe...

I find myself there.

Jumping happily, never knowing what lies beyond my beautiful little secluded world of security.

If you've ever been to that great place where it seems that nothing could ever

go wrong then you know.

You know that it rarely stays long.

Or maybe it does...

Maybe somewhere, deep within the boundaries of our minds, that place will always be there.

Maybe it's just waiting for us to find it again.

Maybe, just maybe....